Forgiveness core tool of anger management

Do you believe in forgiveness or revenge? or both, depending on the circumstances? That was the topic this evening in our anger management class held in Orange, California. The topic brings out many conflicting emotions in participants, as all admitted to struggling with the concept of forgiveness and letting go of grievances. Research shows that people who can forgive have better, healthier lives, with much less anger and turmoil. Yet, some admitted they felt like “wimps” for “weak”  if they didn’t get “even” with those who had wronged them, especially if it was done on purpose with ill intent. The rebuttal to that issue is that forgiveness occurs in the heart and not in your interaction with those you forgive. This means that you can forgive, but still protect yourself from further abuse by the offending person. You can forgive, but sever the relationship. We then discussed that this is easier to do if you can find a way to not take the offense so personally and find a way to put positive meaning into the bad experience you had.